Dean coughs, still holding his chest as he doubles over. He uses the blood to paint warding onto the door. What has he got to lose? Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love. (she stands now, growing angry) I said I wasn't gonna do this again. It still won't open for him. But you don't have a choice. Donna exits to work elsewhere in the silo. It's got beef with me, especially after what I just did. CASTIEL Bobby nods solemnly. And you think that hate and anger, that's That's what drives you, that's who you are. A pattern? ", Collins noted that the battle certainly isn't over when it comes to fighting for onscreen representation because it shouldn't be a fight at all. Told them getting here was the order from the boss, and they came runnin'. The CW. CASTIEL Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favour of fair use.This research video was made for educational purposes and I am not profiting off of it in any way. Or something. We need somewhere secure, contained. We don't care about you because you're useful or because you fit into some grand design. No. You led Jack through his trials. Dean still stands before him. Why have I been eating rubbery trash eggs all my life?! DEAN It's time. A spell, "Praeses Magna." I'm the one you want. Come on, Dean. Cut back to Donna, who is still standing next to her truck. John's fondest wish is to one day produce a film of his own. Yo, grab the gun, let's get out of here. Make the sign of the cross, In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit., State how long it has been since your last Confession: My last confession was _______ weeks (months, years) ago.. I pulled a gun on you. For 15 seasons, Supernatural has told the story of Dean Winchester (Jensen Ackles) and his brother Sam (Jared Padalecki). Dean stands to exit. You are everything I lived to set right. He knows Jack is right. Sam speaks to Donna, who has found a suitable place to take refuge. Scythe in hand, he walks quietly towards her. BILLIE Cut to DEAN, who is still alone in the basement of the bunker, still sitting against the wall where CASTIEL had pushed him. Charlie is very charming, but Stevie isn't budging about this. Alright. Donna and Jack paint more warding on the walls. That's good, okay, but it won't last forever. Vast. Notes: Will Dean be able to make it through this world alive while trying to find his family?Read to find out. Cas and Dean had been circling like moths around a flame. (holds up a book) I found it in Rowena's things. Anyone who might be on Billie's list. The three of them look around. If he has to witness any more sidelong (or direct!) Then we'll wreck her place. I gave what he asked of me. He swings it at Billie. BILLIE You're my family. Perhaps start with the ones that are most difficult to say. The warded door busts open. CHUCK Sam, I'm sorry. Yeah. It's difficult to ignore the ship's validity when Castiel and Dean frequently send each other longing stares that linger far too long to be platonic and exchange deep emotional confessions. Billie closes God's book, still smiling. (to the reaper, determined now) The plan has changed. She makes Jack disappear from his chair, where Jack finds himself in the Empty, in front of the Cosmic Entity, who is seated in front of him in the form of Meg. It should stop The Empty from getting back in here. Thing is, that time? Misha's Roadfood just got nominated for Daytime Emmys. "Incoming Call: Sam" He stares at it, then looks around, tears in his eyes. They both vanish. No sight of Billie. I've been in touch with Bobby. Dean wakes up hungover. I'm scared, Cas. I know. It's only the three of them left. I'm the one who woke you up. DEAN DEAN Supernatural's latest episode sees a major character seemingly reveal his true feelings as he says goodbye - here's why the moment has divided fans. Billie gestures quickly towards Dean, and he goes flying back across the room, dropping the scythe as he hits the far wall. He dropped, his knees hitting the floor in sync with the ominous bang on the door. Warning: SPOILERS ahead for Supernatural season 15, episode 18, "Despair". The refugees, BOBBY, CHARLIE, DONNA, and JACK look on, tense. Dean goes flying across the room. Still Dean Winchester. John Atkinson has been a news and feature writer for Screen Rant since late 2018. He grabs Dean by the shoulders to guide him away. Jack, deep breaths. (hangs up the phone). (on the phone) Yeah, I understand. For Sam, for Dean, for the world. He pants in pain. Sam nods to Charlie, grateful, then nods to Dean with urgent determination. Getting dangerously close to burning their wings, but never getting close enough to each other to meet. Whats the point, everyone else gets a win. CHARLIE Castiel had this coming for a long time. Low flame. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know. He thinks he knows what this is. Cut to a suburban street outside of EILEEN'S HOUSE. Castiel turns towards him. I felt nothing. I had a stroke 6 years ago and have difficulty getting the words from my brain and out of my mouth correctly, but have no difficulty reading words that are written. 10 allthingsmango 2 yr. ago I think Misha was having a hard time shooting it because it was most likely his very last scene on the set of Spn, and the wrap of Castiel as a character. Jack, Dean, and Castiel follow him out of the car a moment later. It's not. Sam drops God's book on the table and walks past her to rejoin the others. Maybe not. He holds Sam's neck, pats his shoulder, they nod, summoning their strength despite Sam's loss and how bleak the outlook of killing Death is. SAM: Just wait. Dean pulls a gun on Sam, who is blocking the hallway. The man looks staggering alike a certain angel and is on the run. Castiel puts a consoling hand on Jack's shoulder, then sighs. Quote: But still beautiful. Still Dean Winchester. Supernatural's Misha Collins Refutes Spanish Dub of Castiel's Confession to Dean, Confirms 'There Never Was an Alternate Ending' to Episode 18 By Rebecca Iannucci / November 26 2020, 6:07 AM PST The Cosmic Entity is shocked. Sam's phone shows "" that Eileen is texting. The Empty is pissed. CASTIEL stands outside of the Impala, looking up at the apartment. SAM: I need you to trust me. What he DIDN'T expect was for it to be, or become, anything other than a fantasy, for a day. "When Bob Berens, who was a producer on the show and the writer of the episode in which my character dies, proposed this ending where my character confesses his love for Dean, who's one of the two main characters, I was like, 'Oh, we can do that? Cas helps him out of the room, through the corridors. So he feels something warm and soft and light around his soul, and he pulls and clings to the angel for which he's willing to give his heart and life. Feel free to adapt the above to such a purpose - an attribution would be appreciated. Not until I get what I came for. For fans who have been hoping for Destiel since its inception,. Seems like it worked. Jack is pulled towards it. Dean's look hardens again. Leave me. So. And everyone who knows you see it. Castiel points out that one thing can hurt her -- the Cosmic Entity from the Empty. Chuck saw it coming. However, it can't reach her on Earth, unless summoned. Castiel: Jack. BILLIE Happiness isn't in the having, it's in the being. Fans had long-hoped that Dean (Ackles) and Castiel (Collins) would get together, "shipping" hoping for a relationship between two characters the couple as "Destiel." On Thursday's episode, titled "Despair," the show appears to have confirmed that there were feelings between the characters. Has the whole world vanished? What's changed?Dean: Oh, I don't know. Jack shakes in pain then vanishes in a flash of light. Cas. It's like I just couldn't stop. Should boost the strength of all the warding. Because I was angry and because I just needed something to kill, and because that's all I know how to do. Dean climbs back to standing, grabbing the scythe up again. (realizing) It's a chain reaction. THAT homosexual declaration of love scene overlaid with the script that leaked. You fought for this whole world for love. Dean wants to end it with Billie -- she left her scythe, and he thinks he can kill her with that. SAM (to Jack) Sacrificing your life for a cause takes a lot of courage. He's doing likewise, so Cut back to Sam, who is looking at Jack through the back window as he puts gas in the car. Billie knows he's wrong. Over the years, they faced everything from wendigo and vampires to demons and rogue angels. Dean is losing the battle. Billie chokes Castiel with her hand now, baring her teeth as he shoves him against a wall, then up it, off his feet. Castiel and Jack sit in tense silence in the back seat. Castiel's confession was written by an out gay man, Robert Berens. While Castiel is pouring his heart out, Dean is just standing there in shock and most notably, he doesn't say "I love you" back. Stevie is gone. While Dean does not reciprocate this declaration of love in the American version of the episode, a Spanish dub has Dean respond, "Yo a ti, Cas," or "And I you, Cas." DEAN BILLIE Charlie calls Sam and Dean who along with Jack and Castiel travel to see her. SAM As Dana runs to hug her parents, all three of them disappear in a puff of dust. DESTIEL IT'S CANON!!!!! You killed me, Dean. My strong bronze hammer, oh how you changed my life.My brittle little diamond, how I wish to be your wife.My priceless little gem, your words spoken like gospel.A voice so enchanting, yet so stern and hostile. I wanted to make things right. SAM supports JACK as they rush from the hallway to the map room. Charlie crosses her arms, frustrated. Dean looks unsure. DONNA Whether or not some of the cast supports it or fans believe its validity is irrelevant. There's no more time. Before Sam and Jack's eyes, Donna vanishes, too. Castiel sighs. Still beautiful. Equally, the moment harkened back to Castiel's first introduction - he left a handprint on Dean's shoulder both times - thus bringing things somewhat full circle. CASTIEL DEAN Castiel confessed his love to Dean and experienced a moment of true happiness, which allowed the Empty to take him and saved Dean's life in the process. Cas' confession made both of them think deeply. COSMIC ENTITY Castiel agrees to go with him. Just when you thought 2020 couldn't get any wilder, Supernatural delivered a plot twist that is blowing up the internet. Jack collapses, and Sam and Castiel rush to his side. What do they want? So, what, is she just some collateral damage to you? Listen to the Priest: The priest may read a passage from Holy Scripture, offer a prayer, encouragement, etc. I put up the warding that you asked for. BOBBY aka, Dean and Cas are pulled out of their world seconds before the Empty takes Cas, seconds after his confession. Thursday night's episode of Supernatural saw the long-beloved ship of demon hunter Dean Winchester (Jensen Ackles) and the angel Castiel (Misha Collins) a mere 12 years after . Dean inhales, leaning back in relief as the pain subsides. We gotta go. 'Cause I do. Sam looks up, distressed. But- he stops, the words trapped under his tongue, begging for release, begging to be spoken. You know, I gotta dig through the archives and work on finding spells. Not without being summoned. We trended for days. I cared about the whole world because of you. Billie wants us dead. JACK He looks at his hand in concern. In her library, one of Death's helpers tells her that he did the warding she asked for to keep out the Empty. You're "daddy's blunt instrument." Death and me need a word. The plan. Castiel looks over his shoulder where Billie still approaches. All the same words (or close to it) with a little more action ;). I know how you see yourself, Dean. As such, it would be interesting to see how his declaration will be dealt with. Both Dean and Castiel are thrown back, and they run for the door back to the Bunker. That is, until it became abundantly clear that, no, actually, he wasn't making it up, as Cas says one simple, devastating statement. Supernatural October 11, 2020. have tried to straightwash the historical moment, exclusive interview with Looper's sister site Mashed, "Roadfood" actor Misha Collins revealed. After all, though the group has often expressed love for each other, Castiel's final words had more than a tinge of the romantic - especially, with Dean being overtly heterosexual, in Castiel being unable to have what he wanted. What are you talking about, Dean? Cas asks softly. One of Rowena's spells. 27 Apr 2023 03:08:59 I know, I know that! He doesn't receive an answer from her. We care about you because you're you.Jack: God, the Empty, Billie, everyone's so mad at us and I don't have my powers. While we've done our best to make the core functionality of this site accessible without javascript, it will work better with it enabled. Sam is stunned. DEAN You said this was a suicide mission. Dean stares at Castiel as he speaks, hearing but not listening to his speech, and his chest feels like it's on fire. She smiles sadly to see them. Castiel wanted to tell Dean so badly that he was back, but after everything that was said, he doesnt know if he can handle a rejection from Dean. The Empty is strong. It aired on November 5, 2020. Don't let me hurt you. With all that changed in Heaven, he had been keeping busy but Dean seemed to always be on his mind. In the Empty, Jack is alive. And that means you're just wasting time. What my true happiness could even look like. Castiel turned back toward the door, his body between Dean and the banging sounds, as if he can stop it, stop her, from happening. She set us up. Worse than that, they lost someone who wasn't from another world. My Lovely little angel, oh how you raise me from sin.My wonderful little seraph, how you make my head spin.My glorious winged soldier, your eyes much like paradise.The glimpse of a realty, where theyll be no sacrifice. CASTIEL We have to get everyone to safety. Bobby vanishes into dust. I don't know why I'm even here. But it's not over yet. Despite hundreds of thousands of Destiel fan works dedicated to the ship, most fans gave up on the canonization of the pairing before it began. You may kneel at the screen or sit to talk face-to-face with the priest. Because of you. Dr Brian Neil Talarico, North Bay Psychiatrist Has been convicted of child molestation, and possession of child pornography on his computer. Chuck. Sam looks with concern over to Dean. SAM Cut to The Bunker, where Jack lands on the floor, startled. They're not on Death's list. Cut back to the silo where JACK and SAM look around at the emptiness in shock. As such, he pursued a career in screenwriting and film journalism when it became apparent that actually becoming Spider-Man was impossible. Castiel pulls Dean away, almost carrying him through the bunker as Dean gasps and grunts in pain. It's the old Harmon property. Still Dean Winchester. (to Sam) Uh magic. We care about you because you're you. DEAN Suddenly, he vanishes. He grabs a chair and helps Jack into it. Friends, family, people you care about, they all end up dead. Dean holds the pressure, threatening to slice into her. (to Jack) Sacrificing your life for a cause takes a lot of courage. In subsequent tweets, Misha apologized "about how tone-deaf my video is" and responded directly to comments from LGBTQ+ fans who felt unheard. Try to slow this down if you can. Not against monsters or Chuck--Jack is God now--but against his grief. Billie and God a.k.a. BILLIE Here are our picks for the top ten heartfelt Castiel quotes. Castiel steps forward to catch him from falling as Billie slices at the air where they had just been. Castiel doesn't even have close to that facial expression when he tells Dean that he thinks of him as dead to him. Billie: I didn't hurt your friends.Dean: What?Billie: You're in the wrong place, Dean. Sam's happy with Eileen, Jack's the new God, and Cas is Cas is alive. Dean clutches his heart, groaning in pain. Didn't have time to truck in a port-a-john. Listen to the Priest. BILLIE Time for the sweet release of death? Fans shouldn't discount Dean's unaddressed yet seemingly ever-present battle with his sexuality, either. DEAN Related: Supernatural: Is Castiel Really Dead? Donna notices this. They hurry down the stairs. SAM Death follows, taunting them. During the scene in question, Castiel confesses his love to Dean before sacrificing himself to stop Death. Jack's powerless. BILLIE While Sam and Dean go to speak to her, Jack tells Castiel that he feels useless to help now he has no powers. This is the sort of episode where some big moments from the past could be revealed and Castiel fans could have their heart smashed into pieces. Jack notices a weed growing in the dirt just inside the silo's wall. Now, we couldn't make Chuck pay, but Billie? Or: The Hanahaki disease is a punishment made by God for angels who fall too far for humanity. DEAN Cas, Sam, and Dean go to comfort Jack, but Death intervenes. He is gonna flirt his ass off with the angel Castiel. So. To put down. In a December 2020 interview, Dean's Latin American voice actor, Guillermo Rojas, confirmed that the reciprocation was not scripted or spoken in the original English version, but it was scripted as "me too (platonic) in the Spanish script, and changed to be romantic by the dub director. Everybody. His powers are gone, so what was that? Cookies help us deliver our Services. They took down Chuck. SAM Dean wanders the room. DONNA Tears streamed down Cass face as he closed his eyes. I have to die. He looks back at Sam, who sighs and slowly stands. The message sent with this scene is that LGBTQ people deserve punishment, which is absolutely disgusting and genuinely dangerous. The angel hunches over, feeling the absurd need to gasp for air he doesnt need, when the small object forces its way out of his mouth. Billie appears and tells them that she can not stop the process of what Jack is going through. The wound on her shoulder looks necrotic and sticky, the ugly green wound stretching across her shoulder and onto her chest beneath her shirt. DEAN Dean and Sam are telling Charlie of Death's plan and speculating that she has sent Stevie back to Apocalypse World as she wants to out everything back in order. Rule-breaking. Ive had a pretty shit life. This is NOT a John-friendly fic, at all. To tame. How long you been waiting to ask me that? I can't do that with one eye on the road, so. How're you feeling? COSMIC ENTITY Jensen would later state at a virtual meet and greet that he did not wish to "over-define" the scene, saying that he was not sure that Castiel as an angel could feel love in the same way as a human, believing the "I love you" could have a multitude of meanings, including "brother in arms.". BILLIE Cas is gone and Dean is trying to keep it together, he's moved to LA, found a honest to God job, sold Baby andhe's basically living a muted life as a survivalist and retired hunter, grieving his best friend. It was Chuck all along. Has to use the assets in his arsenal. Heh, you're not looking so hot. Cut back to Sam. (panting with effort and pain) I didn't hurt your friends. It's right there in the script to live forever in the show. Charlie looks up, concerned. She wants to send you back. Dean returns his focus to Charlie. RT @CasIsLoved: Castiel and his love confession became Supernatural's legacy. Oh, I don't know. You know, we were so close to beating him. So he feels something warm and soft and light around his soul, and he pulls and clings to the angel for which he's willing to give his heart and life. Charlie exits to the silo while Sam waits behind. I'm coming apart. Blood smeared on his jaw, the perfect impression of the angels hand. He kneels down to get a better look. DONNA leans against the side of her truck, phone to her ear as she talks to SAM. Hey, hey, hey, we're not giving up on you, okay? Something I can't survive. Bravo. Thought Stevie might need my help. Doing the penance will diminish the temporal punishment due to sins already forgiven. They get it, Sam. It shudders. I don't care about your family. CASTIEL I'm the one you want. Everything this man touches turns to gold. She turns. There is warding painted in black all over the walls. SAM However, he'd come to realize that happiness didn't come from the having of something, but merely from the feeling and the expression. She will get through that door. Dean said, looking up at Castiel. Despair is the 18th episode of Season 15. Misha Collins went on to post video to his Twitter to put the record straight that there was never any planned, scripted, or filmed reciprocation from Dean in this episode. I'll let you in on something. I was happy for myself, happy for my friends, happy for Castiel getting to speak his truth and be free. Hey, my name is Scott Smith. It would be difficult to argue against such statements. In the scene, Castiel makes a speech to Dean, saying: "I never found an answer because the one thing I want is something I know I can't have. Out walks CHARLIE, a backpack over her shoulder. Their unconventional family has fluctuated in that time, with their trusted ally, the angel Castiel (Misha Collins), most consistently returning to their side. (through the phone) What's the plan when you get here? You must know what to do. Okay. Sam picks up God's book and tries to open it again. He realizes that Eileen might be next. Death-defying. It was fatal. She asks him how he got there -- Jack can only apologize before he explodes. I can't stop this. Jack was a bomb designed to annihilate cosmic forces. Dean realizes he's wasted his time, like she said. And it's a goodbye and that's not good enough. To somehow. Billie's empty hand falls. They should be okay. So we have no heavy hitters on our side. http://www.supernaturalwiki.com/index.php?title=15.18_Despair_(transcript)&oldid=198002. Your whole plan. DEAN REAPER We've got more folks headed this way. SAM approaches in the doorway, wiping his face with exhaustion. SAM [Laughs] The fact that we're having a conversation about it is indicative of the fact that we have a long way to go.". It keeps me from getting frustrated with myself and forgetting words of contrition etc. I've got work to do. I just don't want this to happen to anyone else. With the plan in full motion, Sam, Dean, Castiel and Jack fight for the good of the common goal. A major character was killed off in the Nov. 5 . SAM EILEEN: Please, Sam tell me what's going on? November 6, 2020. Dean and Sam both take in this information, that the bomb in Jack went off, and look down solemnly. during filming. It was great to see the long-serving character finally express his true feelings (and sexuality), as well as Collins truly nail the performance. Even if there was a placard inside the confessional with the prayers may bring more people in. We don't care about you because you're useful or you fit into some grand design. He noted that they have no one of power to help them. As the Empty enters, Castiel pushes Dean aside as the Empty takes both Death and Castiel, who greets his death with a smile. Castiel rounds the Impala to sit on the hood next to Jack. He tells Dean he is the most loving and selfless person he ever knew. The scythe drops. Well. Sam enters from above, a can of spray paint in his hands. Wh How are they like this?! Dean apologizes for pulling a gun on him, explaining that his desire to kill Chuck had made him unable to see what he was doing. You should be okay, too. Sam: Yeah, well if Dean and Cas can pull this off, we shouldn't be here too long. 1. Castiel found himself scared. Castiel Confesses Feelings for Dean Winchester Pining Hurt Emotional Hurt Hurt No Comfort Hurt Castiel (Supernatural) Temporary Character Death Unrequited Love Possibly Unrequited Love Character Study Castiel Character Study (Supernatural) I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping I Wrote This While Listening to Hozier's Music Billie stalks slowly forward as Dean, followed by Cas, make a break for it down the aisle. BILLIE He loves him. You know, I'm no expert on this hoodoo stuff, but Best we patch that up, yeah? Castiel stills, before he straightens again. She drops God's book. Jack exits to the silo, leaving Donna and Sam to talk. Stevie plates the eggs and turns to look at CHARLIE who is seated at the table behind her, cleaning a handgun. That fact has remained true throughout the final season, as Team Free Will has battled their biggest threats ever: Death a.k.a. Castiel finds a pocket knife in Dean's back pants pocket and uses it to cut his own palm. Donna understands, clears her throat, moves the topic along. (crying) God, The Empty, Billie Everyone's so mad at us, and I don't have my powers. Sam nods. As it vibrates, ringing again, he looks at it. This isn't a negotiation. Castiel rushes at Billie, but he's stopped short as she stretches out her hand, and he's caught by an invisible grip on his neck. After an outside establishing shot of the bunker at night, we cut to DEAN who is sitting at a table in the bunker's lounge, drinking from a glass of whiskey ("Field's Kentucky bourbon"). 26 Apr 2023 23:45:03 Without turning, she address him. As he speaks the words, a portal opens, and the black goo of the Empty comes into the room, at the moment Death also finally breaks through the warding. (Angrily to Jack, in tears) You did this! I can't believe this happened. Jack screams, then explodes in a burst of yellow light. Billie stands behind it with her scythe. Remember what he was looking for? (pointing the gun at Chuck) Screw you, Chuck. Sam struggles to hold back his grief, and decides they should get everyone being targeted and take them to a safe warded place. It made my time on the show feel more meaningful and valuable, so I'm very grateful for it. The screen is cracked. Come on. Everything this man touches turns to gold. One thing she wishes before she dies is to see Dean dead. What do they need? Just try to focus. He says he knows everyone will die and it is his fault. It's not. No response. He had prior convictions for child molestation in 1990 and 2001. A blue truck arrives, parks. Some hug. You've been quiet. (We also accept donations year-round, so you are able to donate whenever is convenient for you.). DEAN: This is Dean's other-other cell, so. STEVIE Dean finds the door they'd come through, and he and Castiel rush through it, back for the bunker. Castiel follows Dean to the Impala while Sam and Jack are left behind, watching them go. SAM (sad laugh as a tear rolls down his cheek) You changed me, Dean. Dean gestures down the hall. On the balcony, Billie has her necrotic, injured hand outstretched, squeezing. What does that mean? "Supernatural" fans began shipping Castiel(Misha Collins) and Dean Winchester (Jensen Ackles) almost immediately after Collins' season 4 introduction to the series. He holds his cellphone in his hand. As per the family business, they traversed America, saving people and hunting things. DEAN Could be that you started killing all my friends. By using our Services, you agree to our use of cookies. They both can't sleep. Wait, what about Jack? There's a wet noise from behind Dean and he turns to see black goo from The Empty squeezing through the bricks in the bunker's wall as a portal begins to open. We're on the way. "Roadfood" also airs on PBS, so check your local listings for air times. He's heartbroken, close to tears, but he holds it back. Please note: this story is completed, I'm fixing a few things and I'm going to upload the next ten chapters one by one every couple days. And you have to kill me., (Fic outline by SooooMyNamesRebecca, so blame her for the plot, blame me for the writing! When you cut me, that little nick? We are - quote, Post-Episode: s15e18 Despair (Supernatural), Dean and Castiel should have used their words, Pre-Episode: s15e18 Despair (Supernatural), Castiel Wants Dean Winchester to be Happy, Dean Winchester/Castiel mentioned - Relationship, shameless mistreatment of english grammar. (through the phone) Hey. She clasps her hand into a fist, and Dean feels pain as if his heart is being crushed. And the things that the things we've shared together, they have changed me. Don't rush 'em. I'll try to get as far away as I can. It has many names - the Sacrament of Reconciliation, the Sacrament ofPenance, or the Sacrament of Confession - but it's all the same sacrament. You raised your little brother for love. They ward the silo by painting sigils all over the inside. No chills, no sulfur smell. How can fansnotwonder what could have developed between the characters if they both had a little less baggage and Dean's father wasn't so obsessed with maintaining his toxic masculinity?